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Dec. 31st, 2022 02:56 pm
polarvoid: (❀ Frangipani)
[personal profile] polarvoid
WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, CHARACTER NAME/ALIAS.

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<Daisy>This is Basil! I'm not around right now, but if you leave a message I'll get back to it as soon as I can.
<BANNED USER> SCREENED MESSAGE. UNSCREEN? Y/N -- sample for when you ban someone
<USERNAME> First sentence of message.
<USERNAME> First sentence of message.
zoomingupthathill: (for the ones we love)
From: [personal profile] zoomingupthathill
[ She's tried so, so hard to hide it. To ignore it. To not acknowledge it. But now, it's out there. That she's broken, and she won't go back together. Her outside matches her inside, you are sick, and the way Basil's voice shakes, how he trails off, she wonders if he's looking at her differently now. With pity, with dismay, because she's not the strong girl she's pretended to be. After all of this, it has to be clear—she's weak, so incredibly weak.

Her lungs feel like something's squeezing them as little gasps start to build in her. Breathing be damned, it's just uncomfortable. Her head's spinning, suddenly warm in ways that have nothing to do with Basil's warmth. Her eyes feel wet, is she really crying again, is this really what she's doing right now, is she really this pathetic—

Warmth.

Warmth, like a heated blanket. Like a cup of soup on a cold day. Like a spring California night, walking under the pier, right before it'd get too hot and stifling.

All centered around her hands, stiff and tense in her lap.

Max's head whips up, her eyes snap open, and she looks into Basil's eyes, tears falling from her own. She's still small, and she's still vulnerable. But what he looks back at her with...

It doesn't feel like pity.

Before, she'd pulled him into a hug for his own sake. Because she felt that Basil needed—deserved that sort of physical comfort. Now, it's for her own that she pitches forward to lean her forehead against his shoulder, her fingers uncurling from their almost claw-like position and slipping between his, so that he doesn't let go. Her broken antler swings from the sudden motion, dripping bloody velvet onto his floor, and her whole one probably presses into the side of his head.

But, for the first time since she was pulled from the water, Max has stopped shivering. ]

Date: 2023-04-30 08:07 am (UTC)
zoomingupthathill: (🛹 and i'd get him to swap our places)
From: [personal profile] zoomingupthathill
[ The warmth of Basil's hands makes her skin tingle. It's drawing the water from her soaked, dead flesh, but even more than that—there's an unquantifiable part of it, more than just acting as a glorified heat lamp. Perhaps it's because right now, her nerves feel shot, both physically and emotionally, as now... There's more she could say. But she feels as hollow as Basil, tired and empty of the secrets that have weighed her down for months.

That he'd hear it all. Everything, and still offer such a simple and kind gesture as holding her hands. It means more than any words could. It means more than Max could even try to understand or explain. ]


I n-never even...admitted it to- to myself. [ Quiet, almost whispered right into his collar between wet gasps. ] But...if I'm s- saying it now...it's gotta be true, right? I- I'm never...never getting better.

[ Her tears, impossibly warm for her but still cold for anyone with a heartbeat, soak into his clothes and scales as she gives up on swallowing down any of this. On instinct, her body tries to take in more air, because she's lightheaded from distress and that's what used to work. What results is Max's turn at a full-body sob, shaking and clutching Basil's hands tighter.

Right against him like this, Basil may feel Max's forehead, starkly and noticeably warmer than the rest of her from an inexplicable fever. ]
zoomingupthathill: (i'm still afraid to be there)
From: [personal profile] zoomingupthathill
[ Max often thinks back to her very first week here—well, Felfri. She remembers laying out on a cot with an unfamiliar boy whose mansion of a house she would come to live with. She remembers her ruined arm re-stitching itself together. She remembers the moment he found the deeper damage, remembers how she shook her head in fear.

That there was a chance to beg for them to be healed, but the idea of someone else poking around inside her was too terrifying to comprehend. Not after Vecna invading her mind. Not after the scientists of E+L carving her open.

It's stupid, how horrible things happening to her kept Max from seizing opportunities. What if it didn't work? But what if it did?

Those sorts of thoughts swim around her head. It's dizzying. Or...maybe that's just the weird way she's reacting to what undead do instead of drown.

Still, Basil centers her. Without her music to, it's all she has. How his support is quite literally keeping her body upright, as she can't put the weight on her knees. How the warmth from his hands radiates outward, like it's enveloping them in a gentle aura. The sobs tearing through her disrupt it a little—but they also keep her from spilling anything else from her loose lips, and at the moment, she'll take it. It's not fair, it's not, but there's nothing she can do about it.

For a long while, that's all there is. Until either her crying or his heat or some combination of the two expel all the water from her. Even her hair's airdried, and her grip on Basil's hands has weakened. If she were thinking about it, she would've shifted to a more comfortable position. But now somehow her thighs tingle with pins and needles, as do her arms. Like the water previously in her lungs, it's a reason to pull away.

But, this time she doesn't. ]


'm sorry. [ With a scratchy, hoarse voice. ] Please...don't tell, okay?

[ It already hurts that it feels like she's had her insides shown to the world, with March. It already hurts that none of this was anywhere near voluntary. That now, she's been reduced to pleading like a child. ]

Date: 2023-05-01 02:20 pm (UTC)
purevanillacookie: (011)
From: [personal profile] purevanillacookie
[The thunk of the pot being set down perks Pure Vanillas ears, and he trots over to investigate it curiously, while Lavender proceeds to be beside himself with joy at being picked up. Basil will instantly get his fingers covered in sticky syrup as the puppy begins to lick everywhere it's tiny tongue can reach, squirming and wiggling and whining. This boy is made of scales! And warmth! licklicklicklick and Dirt!

Pure Vanilla laughs, 'looking' up from the pot to turn his attention in their direction.]


Indeed! A dear friend of mine had a Cake Dog brought in from our world, and she recently- [gave birth is definitely not it, nor did she rebake herself...] think of it as a flower budding smaller flowers! Lavender attached himself to me.

[Moving away to his desk, he pulls open the top to pull out powdered sugar and wet wipes. He'll set the latter down on top of the desk, then bring the tin of the former over to Basil, opening it and holding it out, smiling.]

It helps. Coat your hands generously.

Date: 2023-05-03 01:37 am (UTC)
purevanillacookie: (002)
From: [personal profile] purevanillacookie
[The powdered sugar will help turn the sticky mess into an easily removable firmer mess, but it also sinks into the puppy the next time Basil pats it, to help firm the icing up and keep it from coming off. Pure Vanilla beams as he listens to Lavender making happy little whining noises as he snuggles into Basils elbow.]

Oh my friend, my world is made up of many similar things! Our sheep's wool is thick, fluffy cotton candy, for example! Mango fish, and blueberry birds. And!

[Closing the tin of sugar and setting it aside, he moves over to a pot in the window, to pick it up. Growing there, small yet, with only one bud barely open, is... yellow orchids? But when Basil looks closer, he will notice the slit across the middle, and the tiny ... eyelash lines?]

I'm afraid I cannot yet show you the Jellyragora full size, but if you pull one out, you can get a sense of what they look like...

[He gestures to another pot, a larger one, that has several tiny little colorful flowers sticking out.]

Date: 2023-05-03 07:24 am (UTC)
zoomingupthathill: (👟 and i'd get him to swap our places)
From: [personal profile] zoomingupthathill
[ She sucks in an unnecessary breath, for two reasons.

For one, she's relived that he's promised. For another, his snout tickles a little. ]


Thank you...for being here.

[ It feels bad to say, considering the nature of here. But it's the truth of what she feels. She needed to see him, because she didn't want to be alone...and here, Basil feels like one of the most important people to her.

Here, in the blue glow, it feels like...before the attic. Sitting with Lucas, only paper and markers to communicate, and a painfully sincere confession.

I'm glad you're here.

She'll examine that later. Probably. ]

Date: 2023-05-04 07:21 am (UTC)
zoomingupthathill: (it's you and me)
From: [personal profile] zoomingupthathill
[ There's a level they can't relate on—because despite everything, Max wants to go home. She wants to go back. She has people waiting for her, and she wants to fight the universe to return.

But...while she's here... She can't keep isolating herself. She's been doing it so much, even from the ones she knows from home. This, right here, even though she can feel her body ache and groan, her head floaty and heavy at the same time, her legs like swiss cheese—

Still. This feels right. Like what she's been missing. It's like breaking out of Vecna's vision all over again, into the arms of those who love her.

If she had the strength, she would squeeze his hands again. ]


I- needed to see you. [ That's what she'd said at the start.

It was true. It was very, very true. ]


But I- I think now, um... We need to...

[ Max doesn't want to move. She doesn't want to do anything but feel this. But. He'd said it already, and the warmth Basil's generated has her almost completely dry.

Her legs need wrapping. At least to keep what's inside them inside and not all over his floor. ]

Date: 2023-05-06 12:00 am (UTC)
zoomingupthathill: (and never know what's good for me)
From: [personal profile] zoomingupthathill
[ Basil moves, and Basil is all that's really holding Max up, so it's natural she sort of moves too. Her thighs press a little more into the floor and she winces. She doesn't think it's fair that she feels the undead equivalent of pins and needles, with no need for her blood to flow. It's a little different, but more than anything she just feels stiff.

Only now does she start to let go of his hands, but it's so she can keep her grip on Basil's arm, instead; easier to stay upright that way.

With an embarrassed little frown, she shakes her head, just as she catches Basil's line of sight, and his relieved sigh.

Despite it all—she's glad. Because it seems like the memory of what's tormenting him has decided to leave for the time being. ]


No. I...think it's more likely I'd fall again.

cw: gore, corpse desecration????

Date: 2023-05-06 08:58 pm (UTC)
zoomingupthathill: (oh‚ help me‚ someone)
From: [personal profile] zoomingupthathill
[ It takes a minute or so for Max to get comfortable, and she tries not to let out a grunt of exertion as Basil helps her back to the bed. She hates feeling this helpless. It makes her want to lash out, despite everything, all the kindness and acceptance, because that's what she's learned. When you're helpless, others will take advantage of you. Accepting help is just another way to provide the world with ammunition.

It's...so hard, not to think that way. Even with all the evidence to the contrary. It's so hard to keep the anger in her from bubbling over and burning those who are just trying to help.

So all Max does is nod. It's okay. She knows he'll come back. (She knows, right?) She knows, he's not leaving her. Max simply nods, watching him silently and stretching out her legs. Once he's gone, she leans her head back on the side of his bed and closes her eyes. The violin's still screeching in her ears, and she murmurs, ]
I still don't understand...why anyone's this nice to me.

[ Just to let it out. Just a little. Just so she doesn't keep spilling how utterly weak she always is.

Her ears twitch as the soft sounds of Basil's footsteps grow slightly fainter. As she can hear the clattering of cabinet doors, the gathering of supplies. Only when those footsteps get louder, as he returns to the room, does Max open her eyes again. She tries to manage a little grateful smile, but it falls flat. ]


Uh... Here... [ She reaches down to roll up her jeans, a lot easier now that they're not soaked.

What he'll see are a collection of bites, some shallow, some incredibly deep, which are where the jam-like blood and moss are leaking from. They look like they've come from something about the size of a medium-sized dog, but with many, many more sharp needle-like teeth.

The most unsettling part of it is...well, her body is dead. Pale and corpse-like. Therefore, the injuries all appear post-mortem, slightly off and wrong. They aren't red with inflammation, aren't actively bleeding, just dripping. With so many of them, it's not how they should be. ]


...Sorry. I know it's...really gross.

Date: 2023-05-06 09:32 pm (UTC)
purevanillacookie: (042)
From: [personal profile] purevanillacookie
[The gasp makes Pure Vanillas ears twist up for a moment in startlement, before he realizes why. Oh. He offers a little smile as he tries to figure out how to explain this.]

No, not quite. They do not think for themselves, or make decisions based on informed ideas. They may react to stimuli such as certain plants do - I have heard tale of plants that close to touch - and may have their own defense mechanisms as trees do with sap or flowers with thorns, but they are simply plants.

[Except for his staff, but that is a symbiotic relationship born of a lot of decisions.

Lavender decides he's tired of being held and begins to squirm to be let down, gumming Basils fingers gently as he does.]

cw: cannibalism, corpse decay mentions

Date: 2023-05-07 03:52 am (UTC)
zoomingupthathill: (and i'm ashamed of running away)
From: [personal profile] zoomingupthathill
[ The spots where the fish tore at her legs look a little pitiful, completely absent of fur like the rest of her leg. It makes them look speckled in a warped and twisted way, and she's self-conscious of it, almost apologizing again before he can even reassure her.

Still, she nods as he gathers up...everything, quietly assuring him, ]
Don't worry about it too much. I, uh...think that's just how it looks in there when it's... When I've gotta eat something...fresh.

[ Max hates to say it like that. But that's what her body looked like the first time she had to eat human meat. This is what it felt like, stiff and pained, like the semblance of being even something halfway to living no longer had to be maintained. The facade was over, and she would stiffen and stop moving and decay. That's what this is. She's decaying. ]

Just- make sure the...um, "bleeding" stops. Then clean, then disinfect, then bandage. [ Oh... Max adds, ] Sorry. It's not that I don't think you know what you're doing, I've just- I've done this a lot.

Date: 2023-05-07 08:30 am (UTC)
zoomingupthathill: (i won't forget)
From: [personal profile] zoomingupthathill
[ It's at this moment that Max realizes:

She's always done this for herself.

There are extreme exceptions, such as after narrowing escaping Vecna the first time, or when she got caught in a blast in Felfri—but barring those or particularly horrible monster changes, Max hasn't let anyone dress her wounds. Or, perhaps rather—

There hadn't been anyone who would, until she got so used to doing it herself that she pushed those who came along away.

A chilly Something runs up her spine; it reminds her of Billy, of a quiet question in a quiet kitchen, her metaphorical outstretched hand that he slapped away.

Max watches a Basil the whole time. She doesn't take her eyes off him, in fear that if she looks somewhere else, her own ghosts will have moved in with his. ]


I was- it was my own fault. I thought... I got cocky. Like, since I don't need to breathe, or...since I had something to block out the music... [ Had. Very lightly she shakes her head. ] It was stupid.
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