[ Basil moves, and her hand slips off his head. It remains hanging in the air for a moment, weak and damp. His natural fire's started to warm her, dry her—but only a little.
Now, she's stuck staring at his eyes. That's not right.
This isn't right. ]
Wha... [ Her mouth feels dry, which is funny, considering how much lake water she's swallowed today.
If she asks him, he'll have to answer. That thought lays unbidden in the back of her mind. ]
I don't...wanna leave you.
[ Here, huddled on the ground in a dark room, gentle blue glow enveloping them... It feels like Max is back in the attic of the Creel House. There, she ripped herself open voluntarily, and for her troubles Vecna spun her a vision wherein her worst fears came true—that when those she loves most hear what's in her head, they'll reject her.
They'll egg on the pain dragging her down into the depths of her own misery.
Is this like that? Are her and Basil...more similar than she'd realized?
Max holds as firm as she can to his tail. It's not firm at all, and if he wants he could probably pull it free, but still. ]
I... I thought everyone would leave me too. If- if they knew. So... I pushed them. I- pushed all of them away, instead. So...they wouldn't know what kind of person I am. How much [ a swallow of nothing, her lips trembling ] I wa- wanted to die, how much I- prayed for something...terrible to happen to me.
[ It's happening again. That attic, only filled with blue light, where she spilled her guts. Where she died. Even though it feels like she's a step from death again, she's not there. This isn't there. She keeps reminding herself that.
And she keeps talking, more voluntarily than she could've imagined. ]
But if I'd s-said something, sooner, maybe... Maybe it wouldn't've turned out like it did.
[ Bleeding so much she went numb. Eyes white and milky. Unable to even feel Lucas' arms around her. ]
If I'd talked to the- the people who loved me, maybe... I wouldn't've... [ This one she holds in. Because if she says it, it'll derail everything. She bites down on her lip, just staring into his inexplicably frightening eyes, until the wave of pain passes. ]
I want- to stay. I want to- listen. I want to listen to you.
cw: suicidal ideation
Now, she's stuck staring at his eyes. That's not right.
This isn't right. ]
Wha... [ Her mouth feels dry, which is funny, considering how much lake water she's swallowed today.
If she asks him, he'll have to answer. That thought lays unbidden in the back of her mind. ]
I don't...wanna leave you.
[ Here, huddled on the ground in a dark room, gentle blue glow enveloping them... It feels like Max is back in the attic of the Creel House. There, she ripped herself open voluntarily, and for her troubles Vecna spun her a vision wherein her worst fears came true—that when those she loves most hear what's in her head, they'll reject her.
They'll egg on the pain dragging her down into the depths of her own misery.
Is this like that? Are her and Basil...more similar than she'd realized?
Max holds as firm as she can to his tail. It's not firm at all, and if he wants he could probably pull it free, but still. ]
I... I thought everyone would leave me too. If- if they knew. So... I pushed them. I- pushed all of them away, instead. So...they wouldn't know what kind of person I am. How much [ a swallow of nothing, her lips trembling ] I wa- wanted to die, how much I- prayed for something...terrible to happen to me.
[ It's happening again. That attic, only filled with blue light, where she spilled her guts. Where she died. Even though it feels like she's a step from death again, she's not there. This isn't there. She keeps reminding herself that.
And she keeps talking, more voluntarily than she could've imagined. ]
But if I'd s-said something, sooner, maybe... Maybe it wouldn't've turned out like it did.
[ Bleeding so much she went numb. Eyes white and milky. Unable to even feel Lucas' arms around her. ]
If I'd talked to the- the people who loved me, maybe... I wouldn't've... [ This one she holds in. Because if she says it, it'll derail everything. She bites down on her lip, just staring into his inexplicably frightening eyes, until the wave of pain passes. ]
I want- to stay. I want to- listen. I want to listen to you.